An off-hand comment in Tracey’s Snarktacular Oscars 2011 liveblog has made me think.
We were talking about the usual topics: the jowls of Tom Hanks, the presenters being way more comfortable than the official hosts, the awful awful writing, Best Sound vs. Best Sound Editing, bored snipers, the Best Foreign-Language Boobins, and the vain hope that Billy Crystal or Sandra Bullock or ANYONE would quietly assume command from the overmatched James Franco and Anne Hathaway. And then Tracey said it…
I loved Reese’s Brigitte Bardot ponytail. She looked fabulous. It sounds corny to say, but she just kind of warms my heart. I find myself wishing happiness for her. I’m a sap.
And you know what? That’s not corny – or it shouldn’t be. It’s sweet. Frankly, we need more saps. So that’s what this is about. I am officially declaring March to be Happiness Month. To join, all you have to do is wish happiness for one person per day throughout March – via Twitter, your own blogs, and (this is best) your prayers if you are inclined to it.
First off – I wish happiness to Charlie Sheen. Yeah, you, Charlie. You may be bitchen and winning and all of that, but this really isn’t funny. I mean… look at the two “goddesses” the “Vatican assassin warlock” has been palling around with:*
The older of these girls looks 17. The other girl probably has an 3-ring binder with geometry homework and “Mrs. Charlie Sheen” inside.
If you were actually happy, you wouldn’t be chasing it so hard. You wouldn’t make such a public and determined spectacle of your own behavior, as if you had to prove to the world how good you have it. You wouldn’t be so violently rejecting everything that you suspected might help you be a stronger and healthier man, who no longer needed everything you’re accustomed to prop you up. Above all, you wouldn’t be so furiously on the attack against everyone else. You wouldn’t claim in that interview to love and support and thank your fans, and then forty seconds later dismiss their concerns with “It’s sad for them” and “Get a job, anyone?” (It starts at 7:50 of the clip linked above the picture.)
You share what you’ve got in this world. Happy people naturally leave happiness in their wake; miserable people spread misery. It’s all they’ve got to share. So Charlie Sheen, you are my first wish. All snark aside – be happy.
* edit, 3/02/11 – Sheen called HIMSELF the Vatican assassin warlock, not the “goddesses.” In my defense, I can only quote the man himself: I can’t process Charlie Sheen with my normal brain.